Ben knocked on the door. “You okay in there?”
“Fine!” I called. My heart jumped into my throat, like he was going to somehow know I had snooped. It wasn’t really snooping since everything was sitting out in the open, but still. I buried the bottles back under the towel and wiped the confused scowl from my face before rejoining him.
“There she is. Thought I was going to have to send in a search party.” Ben had removed his dress shirt and was now in black slacks and a white V-neck T-shirt that sharply contrasted his tanned skin.
“Nope. I’m here.” I smiled, tension falling from my shoulders.
Ben watched me with guarded eyes, and I wondered if he knew that I’d seen his pill collection. Then again, he could have been watching for my reaction, because when I saw what was on his bed, my breath caught in my throat.
He chuckled softly. “That excited, huh?”
I stumbled to a halt. His bed held an array of sex toys—whips, cuffs, dildos, vibrators, weird little rubbery things I had no name for, and a large box sat discarded nearby. “W-what’s all this?”
Ben chuckled at my innocent response. “Gunnar goes through my fan mail and only gives me what he thinks might be interesting. This came from a sex-toy company. They want me to be a spokesmodel.”
“Oh.” My pulse accelerated. “And are you going to?”
“Not planning on it, no. The girl I’m with wouldn’t need any toys, so I wouldn’t make a very good advocate for their products.” He patted the bed beside him. “Come sit. I just thought it’d be fun to look.”
“Right.” I joined him on the bed, arranging myself politely next to him. There sure were a lot of kinky toys.
“And if you wanted anything . . .” He trailed off, leaving the second half of the sentence unspoken but seductive all the same. Was he asking if I wanted any sex toys? I fought to keep my breathing under control, but I could feel the heat crawling up my neck, my chest rising and falling with shallow pants. Sex. Ben. And to think, I’d only just gotten my mind out of the gutter.
“Ben . . . I know things got heated between us the other night . . . but I don’t want to give you the wrong impression. I’m not that girl. I’ve never had a one-night stand. I’m more of a committed relationship, one-boyfriend-at-a-time type.” Thankful my voice sounded calm, I pulled in a breath and met his eyes. “This isn’t going to work for me. I’m sorry.”
He watched me with an amused expression. He leaned down to whisper near my ear, his breath warm against my skin. “When I want something, I can be very persuasive.”
“What do you want?” I whispered, barely recognizing my own voice. It was breathless and much too high.
He rubbed his lips against my jaw, our mouths so close that I could feel the strain in his jaw as he fought the urge to kiss me. “I want to fuck, Emmy.”
“Who?” Heat flooded my cheeks, and I struggled to maintain deep, even breaths.
“You.” Ben’s dark eyes roamed over me, and his fingertips caressed my jaw. “Stop playing games with me. I want you. You’re not like other girls.”
I knew he could see my pulse flutter violently against my neck. I was achy and distracted and completely thrown off center. I’d told him no, convinced him that this couldn’t happen, yet it was all I could think about. All I wanted. I wanted to feel his big, warm hands on my body, feel him press those full, sensuous lips to my skin. I wanted his thick length to invade my body while he whispered filthy things in my ear.
I still hadn’t answered him, and he was waiting. Still watching me. I knew I was frustrating him, and I didn’t mean to. I was leaving us both unsatisfied, but I couldn’t let myself take that leap, could I? Could this really be just sex? Maybe I’d be stupid to deny myself this. It wasn’t every day a girl got to spend a few months living and working in Paris and having a fling with a supermodel. I almost giggled at my predicament. Almost. But Ben’s hungry gaze was still locked on me.
“I want to be clear.” His voice dropped lower. “My past is complicated, my future is uncertain—I travel all the time, I move every few months. But we have this. Here. Now. Don’t deny me, baby.”
Part of me couldn’t even believe I was questioning this. There were people with real problems in the world. Disease. World hunger. And my biggest dilemma was whether or not to give in to exquisite supermodel Ben Shaw. I should’ve slapped myself for worrying about this so much. Just once I wanted to do what I wanted, to listen to my body, to act on my hidden desires rather than be the good, responsible girl my parents raised. I wanted hot, sweaty sex. No strings attached. I wanted to let this man have his way with me, dominate my body, show me all the ways he could pleasure me.
Everything about this man oozed sex appeal. His strong jaw, the curve of his mouth, the set of his posture, his possessive eyes. His smile had disappeared and he was watching me intently.
Ben dropped his hand from my jawline and pulled in a sharp breath. “Any of these interest you?” His hand swept across the bed, indicating the array of oversized toys.
I chuckled nervously. “A lady never tells.”
“And a gentleman never asks, but I’m neither, so spill it, darling.”
Don’t let him see how rattled you are. Be confident. Pushing my shoulders back to conceal the flash of heat that traveled through my core, I pointed to a modest purple glittery toy. “That would do the trick.”
“Hmm.” He thoughtfully looked over the toy I’d indicated. “We’ll have to work up to this then.” He placed the largest one next to my hip—a long, flesh-colored member, thick as all get-out.
“Ha, aren’t you funny.” I shifted uncomfortably on the bed. The damn thing was nudging my hip. “Nooo, I don’t need all that.”
“I wasn’t talking about the toy, sweetheart.” His stare cut straight into mine. He picked up a little silver vibrator, holding it in his large, masculine palm. “You can borrow this one. It won’t do me any good.” His voice had dropped even lower and sent a rush of desire through me.
I didn’t have the heart to tell him I had the upgraded model down in my room. My heart kicked up a notch, stuttering inside my chest. My resolve to keep things professional vanished. The alcohol had left me gloriously relaxed. And slightly turned on.
Ben turned on the toy, running it along my knee. The gentle buzz against the bare skin made my entire leg tingle. I swallowed roughly. I clamped my knees together, my breathing shallow and much too fast. The gentle hum from the toy sent little jolts up my leg as Ben lazily traced it against my skin. My panties were soaking wet and my br**sts felt so full and heavy, they heaved with each breath I drew.
He placed the toy against my knee. I started to quiver.
“Ben?” My voice was a soft murmur but I meant it as a warning.
He ignored me, moving the little buzzing toy in a slow progression up my thigh.
“Shh. Let me make you feel good.” He pushed the fabric of my dress up, exposing my white panties, and lightly pressed the toy against the already damp fabric. I gripped his biceps for support as pleasure rocketed through me.
I knew things could go further if I wanted. And I wanted to give in. So bad. But I knew that despite only knowing him such a short time, this wouldn’t be just a physical act. My heart was already engaged. I sucked so hard at casual sex.
“We can’t do this.” I found my voice, however shaky it sounded.
“Let me make you come.” His voice was raw with need.
He touched my panties with the toy, rubbing it in circles along my sensitive flesh. “Isn’t this what you want?”
I pulled my bottom lip into my mouth and bit down. Oh God, yes. I wanted to come. I needed that release.
Without waiting for my response, his warm mouth closed over mine. His lips were full and soft and at the same time demanding. He kissed my lips, my neck, before pulling back to watch me. He took his time, barely brushing my lips with his, letting the anticipation build while our breath mingled.
His lips pressed lightly against mine, not taking but seeking. The answer was yes, God, help me. Yes to anything he wanted. To this. To us. Even if it was only one night of passion, I was defenseless against this man. The toy hummed against me, bringing me closer and closer.
He nibbled my bottom lip and I let out a weak murmur of protest or encouragement; I wasn’t entirely sure which. Ben read it as desire for more because his tongue suddenly caressed my bottom lip where his teeth had just been. My hands moved against the back of his neck and I pulled him closer. His tongue entered my mouth, flirting, sliding gloriously against mine. The stolen moments inside my hotel room came rushing back. His kisses were addictive and desire pooled between my thighs.
The powerful sensations spiraled through me, and I exhaled in a whimper. He didn’t kiss me. He just watched my expression as he moved the toy against me. I was going to come. With him watching me. My fingers curled around his wrist and I let out a breathy moan. I was so close. My legs parted and my h*ps shifted, allowing him to reach the spot I needed. Ben groaned and, using his free hand, shifted the erection tenting his slacks. I looked down and watched him massage the toy against me, and my world exploded into a million tiny pieces. My body clenched wildly, needing something to fill it.
Still reeling from my intense orgasm, I moaned. “Ben, f**k me.”
He turned off the toy and roughly pulled my damp panties down my legs, kissing my inner thigh as he stripped the fabric away. Our hands were suddenly everywhere at once. He unzipped my dress while I pulled his shirt over his head.
He stripped his pants and boxers away in one brief movement, leaving him nude and fully erect in front of me. Now I understood what he meant about the large toy and working up to it. To him. A rock-hard chest and defined abs led the way to a heavy erection. He was big. Bigger than any of the guys I’d been with before. And he was beautiful down there. All man. Long, straight, and thick. I had the strongest desire to curl my hand around him, to touch him and see if he was real. But this moment seemed real. I could see his chest expanding with his slow, certain breaths and smell the masculine scent of his skin.
He leaned down over me, forcing me to lie back against the bed. His body covered mine, pressing me into the mattress. I felt one of the toys press into my lower back, which only made the moment more erotic. My legs moved around his back, tugging him closer. He let out a breathless groan against my neck, causing my sex muscles to clench uncomfortably.
We tumbled together on the bed, kissing deeply. Only my bra remained in place. Ben reached into the drawer of the nightstand and withdrew a package of condoms. He leaned in to kiss me while he rolled one on.
“Come on top, cowgirl.” He lifted me over him so my knees were on either side of his hips. I looked between us to where his long length lay on his belly, nearly reaching his belly button. I swallowed a wave of nerves while a smirk tugged up one corner of his mouth. “Only take what you can handle.”
Sweet baby Jesus, I was already out of my depth. I thought of our sexy texts and a hot shiver raced down my spine. No one could turn me on the way this man could.
He nudged against me and I suddenly worried if he would fit. I lowered myself onto him and sank down slowly. Inch by agonizing inch as he stretched me. I was completely overtaken by the sudden feeling of fullness. Sucking in a sharp breath, I closed my eyes and gripped his shoulders as he slowly but completely filled me. Ben’s large hand on my hip guided, encouraged, and his dark eyes watched mine. His h*ps moved up off the bed, filling me and retreating so his thick c*ck dragged slowly in and out of me. The sensation was incredible. Too much, yet not enough at the same time.
I sat up straight, rotating my h*ps in tiny circles, unable to stop the whimpers tumbling from my lips. I increased my movements, sliding up and down, and his eyes dropped closed. A surge of pride swelled within me. Each time I sank lower and was completely filled, the pleasure burst into a new sensation. Raw need consumed me and my rhythm increased against him.
“Bennn . . .” His name was perfect for moaning and I used it to my advantage, repeating it like a mantra each time he hit the right spot.
His hands reached behind me, unclasping my bra, and removing it from my arms as I moved against him. He sat up to take my breast in his mouth, licking and sucking as I bounced with our movement.
I was only faintly aware that the lights burned brightly overhead, and while it should have made me self-conscious, it didn’t. I wanted to watch this beautiful man. With him I felt alive. There was no room for self-consciousness to creep in around the edges. I let go of all inhibitions and moved against him, crying out his name in a litany of mumbled whimpers.
“Enough.” He sat up and moved me under him in one quick motion. The man had strength to him. The edge to his voice and his serious expression made me wonder if I’d done something wrong. “No more playing. I need to f**k you hard now.”
He moved my legs, arranged them so I was completely open for his perusal, and then he pushed forward, sinking into me, invading my body with his. My breath caught in my throat and I struggled for air.
“Fuck, Emmy. You feel good.” His eyes were dark, his lips parted, and his breathing was fast. This man who was always in perfect control was losing it. For me. I arched my back as the pleasure coursed through me.
There was always a delicate guessing game the first time I was intimate with someone new: wondering how long he would last, if he would warn me before he came, if he’d be loud about it, or completely silent. With Ben, I didn’t have to guess.
“This tight little p**sy’s going to make me come too fast.” His pace slowed, dragging his length in and out of me slowly. He moved his hand between us and pressed his thumb firmly to my clit. I cried out loudly, moving my hips.
I loved how he knew to slow to an almost stop for me to completely enjoy the sensations blossoming inside me. My tight walls clung to him, pulsing and gripping as pleasure exploded deep inside.